


Self destruct.

by basicallyiwriteshit



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Self-Destructive Tendencies, tsukkiyama - Freeform, yamaguchi is impulsive and tsukishima has to deal with it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-03-28
Packaged: 2018-05-29 17:18:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6385306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/basicallyiwriteshit/pseuds/basicallyiwriteshit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Hey Tsukki, can you swim? Because I can’t.” Tsukishima quirks an eyebrow when Tadashi suddenly stands, looking like he’s going back to their bags, before he turns and runs, jumping into the pool.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Self destruct.

Tadashi is prone to self-destructive behavior. Usually it’s simple stuff; not doing homework, putting his hand on a hot pot _he knows is hot_ , repeatedly touching pointy things until his skin is red and raw and bleeding, drinking tea when it’s so hot it scalds your throat. Annoying stuff, but simple nonetheless. Nothing Tsukishima can’t handle. _Nothing life threatening_. 

But today – _today_ – he seems worse than he’s been in a while. The team is out in a group, walking to the local swimming pool together, and Tadashi is having a great time. Tsukishima even finds himself enjoying himself, and he’s smirking at a joke Kageyama’s told when he realizes Tadashi isn’t by his side. With wide eyes, he looks around the group and sees Tadashi, in the middle of the road, at the end of their group. Cars speed around dangerously close to him, and Tsukishima immediately rushes over to him, tugging him back to the sidewalk.

When they reach the pool, Tsukishima has to hold him back from stepping on a broken bottle on the sidewalk outside, and puts sunscreen on him because he refuses. It’s a little troublesome, but Tsukishima doesn’t feel the need to take him home where he can’t hurt himself or those around him. He can deal with this. 

He and Tadashi are soaking their feet in the deep end, watching as Hinata and Kageyama bicker about Hinata riding on his back, when Tadashi speaks for the first time since they departed for the pool.

“Hey Tsukki, can you swim? Because I can’t.” 

Tsukishima quirks an eyebrow when Tadashi suddenly stands, looking like he’s going back to their bags, before he turns and runs, jumping into the pool.  Tsukishima’s eyes widen and he slides into the water, whipping his glasses off and following Tadashi under the water, swimming to catch up with him as he sinks down to the bottom of the pool. By time he hauls Yamaguchi back to the surface, he’s panting for breath, both from panic and the exertion. Yamaguchi is conscious, eyes open and staring, but his chest heaves with every breath. 

Tsukishima looks around. No one’s noticed, thank god. 

Tsukishima’s voice is low and rough as he speaks. “Yamaguchi Tadashi, what were you thinking?”   


Tadashi just stares up at the sky, unblinking, and Tsukishima sighs. He lifts Tadashi out of the water before climbing out himself, and hauls him to his feet. 

“We’re going home.” Tadashi nods, and Tsukishima pulls him to the changing rooms, shaking the whole time. They exit the pool in silence, Tsukishima guiding Tadashi away from the broken glass once more, and while they walk Tsukishima has his hand on Tadashi the whole time. When they reach Tadashi’s house, Tsukishima gets them changed into new clothes, and puts on a kettle of tea as he goes looking for all the spare blankets in the Yamaguchi household. Tadashi is still silent, staring at the dark TV when he returns, and Tsukishima frowns. 

Today really is a bad day. 

“I’m making tea.” Tadashi just nods, and the reality of what just happened hits Tsukishima; if he hadn’t been there, Tadashi might be dead. Nobody was there to watch him. No one was watching him. Tsukishima feels irrational anger bubbling up inside him, but before he can let out a growl, or hit a pillow, the tea kettle screeches, and he goes to grab it off the stove.   


“I– I wanted to see how it felt…” Tsukishima jumps at Tadashi’s voice at the kitchen door, and whirls around.   


“What?”   


“I… I wanted to know how it felt to feel the water slowly fill my lungs…”   


Tsukishima stares at Tadashi, and he vaguely recognizes the blurriness in his vision as tears, and he curses silently. He’s shaking, and crying, and Tsukishima feels _so_ uncool. 

“I’m sorry, Tsukki, I– I didn’t…I just– I don’t know what came over me…” Tadashi looks down, ashamed, and Tsukishima bites his lip.   


“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Tsukishima whispers, eyes falling shut as he turns to pour their tea into cups. “Sometimes you do things that aren’t healthy. But I’ll be there to make sure you’re ok, and you don’t get hurt, ok?”  


Tadashi tears up now, and nods. “O- Of course, Tsukki…” 

“Now come on, there’s a new episode of that stupid magical boy anime you haven’t watched because you wanted to show me, right?”   


Tadashi smiles, taking his cup from Tsukishima’s hands, and they both flop onto the couch, burrowing in blankets, and Tsukishima smiles at his friend as he plays the episode he’d been meaning to watch. He takes a sip of his tea and cringes at how hot it is, and instantly reaches to take Tadashi’s cup from him until it cooled, but he only fumbles, his fingers closing around another set. Confused, he looks up and sees Tadashi’s set his own cup down, and his fingers are curled around _Tadashi’s_ , not the handle of a coffee mug, and he smiles. 

Tadashi may have self-destructive tendencies, but after something big he makes an effort to try and stop it; even if it doesn’t work, it’s comforting that he at least tries. 


End file.
